We are in this evolving time where all of our actions and relationships look different than they did before. Previous to quarantine, we had a natural flow, a natural grace, and a natural ease that we didn’t have to think about. We had a natural rhythm for our own lives, and we had our rhythms with the people we saw regularly.
Some of those rhythms were really beautiful.
And some of those rhythms needed to get disrupted so we could have time to really rethink them and to assess the way that the relationships were going.
This pertains to all relationships — not just romantic ones, but also work relationships, relationships with friends, and relationships with families.
In my spiritual communion, on a daily basis, I work with more than 200 saints from many world religions, ancestors, and highly evolved beings.
Our Guides lovingly ask us to look at the relationships of those closest to you; who you used to have interaction with in person all of the time.
This is a really good time to assess for yourself:
“How healthy were those interactions for me? And whose happiness was I serving in those interactions?”
In your life before quarantine, there were the people you specifically chose to see; and there were the people in your extended community that you saw because you were working together or you were in a community together; like a friend group, church, temple, or any other ongoing community gathering where you’d regularly be seeing certain people.
Whether we’re quarantining with other people or not, we’re spending so much more time on our own, that there’s the inward reflection of who we are. Hopefully, who you are feels really solid to you. And because you so solidly know who you are, you can look at how you interact with others.
Keeping your cup full
In the ideal state, you and every other person on this entire planet are operating with a full cup. These are your feelings of self love, self care, abundance, feeling safe, feeling protected, and feeling whole, so you can be overflowing with your own unique frequency of love.
Though we wish everyone were operating from this place 100% of the time, we know this isn’t always the case. At times, you’re interacting with others whose cups are running low, or they’re needing help, or for their own reasons, they’re reaching into your cup to replenish theirs.
A loving reminder
You are the only one who manages your cup.
You are the only one who manages your energy.
You are the only one who manages your time and how you spend it.
You manage your thoughts.
Though we are all sharing in all of these fields together, you, in your sovereignty, are ultimately the one who makes those decisions for your life.
A relationship building exercise
As you think of your relationships, an exercise you could do is to write down 5 of those close relationships with people you saw frequently before quarantine started and who you anticipate seeing again once it eases. Your 5 people could be family members, friends, coworkers, or extended community.
In particular, pick relationships where there’s something you want to improve. It could be a big improvement or a small improvement.
You can think of those relationships in 3 main phases, Past, Present, Future:
Past: no longer exists
The 1st Phase is What Was but know that dynamic no longer exists. Considering how much quarantine has changed everyone, that previous dynamic is literally in the past and it’s done.
Present: assessment
The 2nd Phase is Assessment. Though you might still be interacting with some of those people, in the present, you have the opportunity to assess:
“How is the energy balance between you and that other person? Were you giving too much?”
So many of us really loving beings are over-giving a lot of the time. And we’re the only ones who control that. We can’t fault other people if we choose to over-give.
A lot of the times, the reason you thought of those 5 people on your list is because you were over-giving or they were over-taking, or there was something that didn’t feel good. And that’s why they’re on your list right now.
Future: envisioning best case scenario
The 3rd Phase is steps for how to manifest the best case scenario for the future.
Before quarantine even fully lifts and you see them in person again, you have this beautiful opportunity now to already reset the new phase of that relationship. And you have the psychological space to do so from such a beautiful place now of love, compassion, and highest intentions.
You can write down each of those names on a piece of paper. Next to each of them, write down:
“What is best case scenario for how we both show up?”
We can always look at everything in our lives through the lens of:
“What’s the highest vibration decision I can make?”
Ask yourself in this two-way street:
“What can you do to improve your relationship? And what can the other person do to improve it?”
Though you know you only have control over yourself, when you set the intention and you communicate with people in your life fairly, openly, and honestly, from a total place of love, trust and highest intentions, other people feel it. They will be ready to respond in different ways in their own time but this is one of the cases where if you have reflected on things, and you have seen these beautiful ways in which things can improve, you have the option to “Go First.”
You could even start the communications now, while we’re in this quiet time of quarantine and while they also have this time. It could be as simple as reaching out and saying that you’ve been thinking about them and you’re looking forward to seeing them in person when the time is right and that you want to keep growing and improving your relationship.
You can word it however feels right to you and is appropriate for that relationship. When you see them again, you want it to be mutually good; mutually beneficial and you’ll customize that message based on the nature of the relationship.
You can set that intention now and plant those seeds while we have the time.
Quarantine will be lifting soon and though no one wants it to last a minute longer than it is, there are so many gifts from this time, and this is one of them. So take it as an opportunity to improve your relationships even before you’re in person with people again. This time actually gives us the space to improve those relationships because if we hadn’t had this quantum pause, a lot of those relationships would have been Same Old, Same Old. And that’s not always a good thing.
A calmer way of being
Even as our Guides were downloading these ideas to me, I felt such a calm in my front heart chakra. The whole field around my heart feels more calm and peaceful because of this loving intention.
Beyond the 5 people that you think about — and it can certainly be more or less, depending on who comes to mind for you — or whether you don’t write anything down and are thinking about the intention of improving your relationships, setting that intention alone is enough because it’s a shift in your way of being. And only you choose that.
Emerging from our caves
Our Guides showed a rather humorous and exaggerated, though not totally incorrect, image of a dark cave and humans emerging from it, with the sunlight blinding us. It’s an extreme analogy but it has its truth. Even for those of you who have been in your essential jobs still going to work in the same physical location, your interactions with the rest of your family and friends have been limited so you’re still feeling it.
As quarantine is lifting in phases, we’ll be coming out of our dark caves, blinded by the sunshine, and we have a choice how we show up once we’re back out there. We can choose to show up in a more loving compassionate, peaceful, whole way.
There are a lot of running jokes / memes about what it’s going to be like interacting with each other in person again. Sometimes people make fun of themselves about their physical state, by saying that they’ve gained weight, or that they’re nervous about what they’re going to wear in the outside world again. Some lament that they haven’t been exercising enough during quarantine or that their diet wasn’t as healthy as it could have been. Some people have been mildly poking fun at themselves; and others are having real anxiety about it.
Those considerations about what people are wearing, and weight gain, are all the material realm — and it’s what we were all supposed to take a break from.
What’s really going to matter is how people show up with their hearts: how we treat each other.
That 5 or 10 pounds that some people are concerned about — when they’re walking around more, those will naturally shed. Your outfit can change in a few seconds, now as anytime.
What matters when we come out of these caves and step out into the blinding sun again is that the radiance of our hearts match the blinding brilliance of the sun.
~ Leah Lau is an energy healer and channel, a Master Akashic Records Reader & Healer, and a Reiki Master Teacher, from San Francisco, who is currently based in Los Angeles. She has had a multi-decade career as an Editor and Photographer, and worked in local, national, and international philanthropy, corporations, government, and nonprofits, including at Charles Schwab & Co., Inc., the Charles Schwab Foundation, the Mayor’s Office of Economic Development in San Francisco through the U.S. Department of Commerce, for General Motors Advanced Technology Vehicles for the prototype electric vehicle program, and as the Director of Communications for a nonprofit in Los Angeles. She holds a BA from the University of Chicago. www.leahlau.com
This article originally appeared in Medium
https://medium.com/@cosmicleah777/emerging-from-quarantine-with-better-relationships-d8944988f38?sk=a9f3d58976506b594e4d1d8572b91197
